Soon, students will be racing to the mailbox to find the fat envelopes of elation or the skinny letters of heartbreak. Almost all will find a mixture of both. This is, of course, a stressful time for high school seniors, and parents can add to that stress or help alleviate it.

Parents can help prepare students for the college transition — and for life as adults — by gently guiding them through this process and allowing them to take ownership of admission decisions.

But who will gently guide the parents? Here, in that spirit, are a few things I would like to remind parents as they navigate the latter stages of the admission process:

• Don’t take admission decisions personally. We are looking for students who will thrive and excel at our institution, not judging your parenting.

• Allow your child to celebrate any and all acceptances. I always cringe when parents tell me their child “only got into two schools” or was “only accepted to one of his top choices.” Each and every acceptance represents four years of educational opportunities and should be met with excitement.

• If your child doesn’t get in, don’t make it seem like the end of the world. It isn’t.

Instead, teach your children to accept disappointment. A college rejection is often the first major disappointment in life. There will be many others. You will be doing your children a favor if you teach them to accept disappointment and take advantage of the opportunities they have, instead of trying to handle disappointment for them.

• Check your pronoun confusion. Remember, it’s not “we” got in, or “we” got denied. Allowing your children to take ownership will help them feel confident in their decisions and prepare them for the transition to college.

• Resist the urge to compare admission decisions with other parents. College admission is not a perfect science, and admission professionals look at a number of different factors when we make our decisions. Being accepted to a particular school doesn’t make your child any better than a friend’s child.

• Try not to influence your child’s final decision. Parents often pay the bills and therefore need to be part of the decision-making process, but ultimately it is your child who will be spending four years at this institution.